the bf agin

This is the boyfriend agin and I just wanted to let yall know that I realy don’t know what is going on but I think we are going to be ok we are just going to have to work it out and talk about everything and I just wanted to let yall know and for the 1 who say I cant spell and what not I don’t care and thanks for the help fpr that other girl and we have been talking and I think we are getting better and her school is going good she talks to me about it a lil but not much I just wanted to let yall know and Jessica when you read this I love you with all my heart you are my world baby you mean so much to me

this is the boyfriend

ya i am new at this but i am going to give it a shotand see if i like it and i think i am cuz i can just vent on here but i love this girl with all my heart and i cant wait for everything we had pland to happen and i love her but things have just started to get realy had and idk why but i am trying to work everything out but then she says i dont want to talk and i think that i did something wrong but i cant tell cuz she wont tell me and idont know what to do so now i thout i would try this and its helping so far but i know she is going to read it and be like WTF but jessica.
i love you with all my heart and you are my world i dont know what i would do if i lost you you mean so much to me and i just love everything about you the way you look when you see me the way you look in the morrning when i wake you up realy early when your doing something i just love everything about you and i want us to get married some day and have a family some day and i realy think that we can do it but i just thot i would try to do this cuz you all ways wanted me to so here i am and i did it now lol and i love you baby and when you hang up on me that hurts a lot baby and when you say you dont want to talk to me that hurts too but i love you and i wont to work all of this stuff out and you are everything to me ok baby and now idk how many ppl ready this thing but now all of them know how i feel about you and this is all the truth ok baby you are my world i love you baby

The voting begins --

I have got 3 good title to start working with.
I would love to have more choices.
So with the help of
Brandi, Mrs. Gambizzle, and LMC I have a few prime choices.
Feel free to add some of your own.
To vote for your favorite -
Simply comment this blog with the number in front of the title.

1. "Last Year to the Beginning of My Life"
2. "The Future is Accounted for and the Rest is History"
3. "Every New Beginning Comes from Some Other Beginning's End"

Now for a little background on each title so you know where it came from.

1. This is my Senior year, the last year of living a life my parents lead. After senior year I am going to be 18 and off on my own. I will begin to live my life.
2. I want to be and Accountant, so my major of college is Accountanting, and my past is history. I will always remember my past it is my history.
3. This my beginning to my life on my own. I have lived the life I am currently living since my birthm, my beginning. As this life I have been living for my parents come to an end. The beginning of my life will begin.

Please take the time to vote for a title or give me a title you like. I love your feedback. I hope to have this blog running tonight or some time tomorrow. Seeing how tomorrow night is my last first school night of grade school. It is so bitter sweet to say that.

Open to Opinions --

Senior year is starting August 23, 2010.

This is anyone's most memorable year of school.

I want to ALWAYS remember it.

To kick off my Senior year I have fell in love with my idea.

Thanks to Brandi I most likely wouldn't have fallen in love with it.

I want to make a . . . . . . . . .

SENIOR YEAR BLOG!

That is right.

A blog to my Senior year.

This way I will ALWAYS have it.

My plan for the blog is too write a blog a day about each day of my Senior year.

It must include at least ONE picture.

At the end of my Senior year.
I will have it printed and bound and give it to my family members.

I fully believe that this is a WONDERFUL idea.

I just have one dilemma.

The name and theme of the blog.

Right now I have one name and no theme.

"Last Year of the Rest of My Life"

I am taking names and themes for the blog.

I would ABSOLUTELY love your help on this.

It would mean ALOT to me seriously.

I want each and every one of you to follow me on this journey.

So please if you will throw some ideas my way and follow my new blog.

The catch is. . . . . .

School starts MONDAY!!

Meaning I hope to have it up and running Sunday night.

That means times a wastin'.

Please ideas?

Where to start --

Buenos Noches Senoritas

Don't let me fool you.
I barely passed high school spanish.
Alot has been happening I have been staying very busy.
Eh, don't let me fool you again.

Let me just try to be straight forward and do a quick catch up post. : )

• Went to Kemah Boardwalk with my big brother and our friend Jessica Sunday.
• Monday I went and saw Scott Pilgrim with my little sister and the rough patch in my relationship started.
• Tuesday I got my high school schedule and went to my friend Kamerin's house and the rough spot continued.
• Wednesday I stayed home and thought about my relationship, needless to say we sorta fixed things for now its more of a work in progress, but we are getting there.
• Today went and looked for a new car. I think I now HATE car shopping as much as much as I hate all shopping! (that is right I am NOT a shopper)
• Edward has been kicking his MOS follow on school's ASS!!!!
• I won a blog award.

Now that my catch up is done and your all filled in let me give you details.

Kemah Boardwalk was awesome with my friends. Summer is ending and it was a great day. Scott Pilgrim is a funny movie, I would say it is a young adult/teen movie. My schedule for my senior year is pretty awesome.

1. Office Aide (meaning I get to sit on my butt)
2. Statistics (math class easier than precal)
3. English 4 (eck, same teacher as last year)
4. Library Aide (another sit on my butt period)
5. Princples of Technology (trying to change to business law)
6. US Government (woo history sorta)
7. Accounting 2 (that is right I do my own taxes how many teens do that?)

As for things with Edward, we are getting over this rough spot. It is taking two to work at this and I just about gave up last night. This has been the worst of this relationship EVER. I mean we both brokedown into tears, beat on things to get the point across, cussing, and yelling. It has been the whole nine yards. We both have lost ALOT of sleep over this. Yet, I am hoping we are coming to the end of it.

Edward is literally owning his follow on school in the face, latest update I got at chow time was 4 out of 24 is passing. He is one of the four. I am so proud of him. He is so ECSTATIC about it. I love to hear the excitement in his voice. He is really happy with him self. I am still supporting him and congradulating him constantly.

I won "The Your Blog is AWESOME Award", thanks to Cris over at Solider Girl.

I don't think my blog is AWESOME, but it is getting there. I now am going to pass this on to 5 blogs I do think are AWESOME.

Nicole @ Flip Flops and Combat Boots, Amber @ Goodnight Moon, Kaylee @ Devil Dog Darling, Brandi @ One Year as Brandi, && Carmen @We See the Same Stars.

Well if any of you have stuck around long enough to read this congrats to you! I hope you all are ready for the weekend!

No one is perfect --

I feel like an untrue blogger. I only post the good. I never post the bad. The past two days have not been great been horrible in our relationship. I lost it on him. Truths came out. I need to breath and make some decisions. I want to blog to vent, but how would I put into words. I am afraid that he would will read it. I am sure it would make a whole lot more sense. I can't even get things straight to fix this situation at hand. I can't put it all together and talk to him about it. So how can I blog about it. I have no clue. Point of this blog is our relationship has hit a MAJOR rough spot.

Edit: In case I forgot to tell you all. I quit my job when he came home so I could be with him. Meaning I am on the hunt for a new job!

Reminisce with me --

Here it is my LAST monday of SUMMER!!

I, Jessica, will start my Senior year of high school in ONE WEEK!

Woo, I am excited and sad. It is one huge bittersweet moment.

I think about it and get happy and sad at the same time.

It will be my LAST first day of grade school.

That one line hits so hard.

I maybe 17, but I can still reminisce on the good ole days.

I remember being in Kindergarten, where the first day was my SCARIEST moment. My mom and dad wake me up bright and early. Dad made my breakfast while my mom was getting me dressed and doing my hair. I eat while my parents got ready. I grabbed my bag and walked out the door, quitely crawled in the truck. I stared out the window on the way there answered a few yes and no questions from my parents when they asked the simple. Are you excited? Will you behave? Are you going to make new friends? I didn't really want to start school. They park the truck, I was looking around at all the kids excited to be at school. They all had they parents hands pulling into the school. I was clentching my moms and dads hands looking around in terror. I felt so SMALL. My parents introduced me to the teacher and she then showed me where I could put my bag and where I would sit. I didn't want to let go of my mom or dad. They were my safe zone, I was comfortable with them and only them. After my parents settling me in, it was time for them to leave. I was upset, I didn't want them to leave. I threw a fit. Yes, that was me the kid that cried when her parents left. They kissed me calmed me down and reassured me it was going to be ok. I was so scared and upset, but I toughed through the day. I kept to myself only talking when spoke too. By the time lunch rolled around I was a little less scared. I talked with a couple of class mates, went to the room then out side for recess where the fun really began. We got to meet all the other classes of kids. I opened up had a great time got back to the room and it was nap time. I didn't want to nap I wanted to talk, but the teacher made me lay still. We finished out the day and headed home on the bus. My mom was waiting at the bus stop I ran too her and hugged her like I hadn't seen her in years. She asked how my day was and I proceeded to say AWESOME!!

I miss the days where your mom and took you too the class room.

It is hard to look back to kindergarten year and not smile.

I have spent 14 years in this house and 12 of it at school.

I have known everyone in school for 12 years.

I am glad to call them my class mates.

I am not ashamed of my class!

I have grew up with them.

They are my family.

I love them.

I will honestly never forget any of my class mates.

Come on Tarkingtion High School Class Of 2011!

Lets make this year,

OUR YEAR!

Needless to say, I am ready for my senior year.

I want to make memories.

What is your favorite Senior year memory?

What about your favorite school memory?

Share with me as I reminisce.

I figured I might be teasing you with one picture a post so here is a few!

At a loss for words --

Obama backs mosque near ground zero

Talk about a killer headline.

That is a disappointment to me.

Wanna read more?

Just click the headline.

Wow, I am not going to even begin to vent on that topic I might get a little out of hand.

As I promised with every post a picture of me and my man.

Motivationless --

Why? I just want to know WHY!!

I don't know why I feel the way I do. I feel as is I have no motivation to do anyting. I shouldn't feel this way, I have school coming up and I NEED the motivation. I used to always be motivated. Especially dating a Marine who is ALWAYS motivated. I am loosing it and I have no clue why. I want my motivation back. I used to be so excited to do things and now its like I never want to do anything. I used to do things with a smile, but now I have no enthusiasm when I do something. I could used to just jump up and clean my room with out a problem, nope not any more I drag butt to get it done. I remember when I loved doing laundry even when my mom offered to do it for me. Now I just pawn it off on her, the only thing she doesn't do it put it away. It just sits in my room in a basket, because I have no motivation to put it away. I sound so lazy and I am not really lazy. I feel as if my motivation has just disappeared.

How can I get my self more Motivated? Any ideas?

P.S. It took me FOREVER to get around to writing this post because I have no motivation to write.

Also, at the end of each post I make I will leave you with a picture for my photoshoot with my Marine.

Test Post

This is a test post.
Thanks for the help Nicole.

Blogging Hiatus #2 --

I am so very deeply sorry.

I owe all of my followers a sincere apology.

I have been a horribly blogger for the past 2 weeks.

Yes, that is right 2 whole weeks of no blogging.

I won't make excuses cause I know there are some loyal bloggers who find time even when they have barely anytime to spare.

I will say this I was extemely busy.

I left the 28 of July to go on vacation with my best friends family.

We went to New Braunfels and tubed the Guadalupe.

We came home the 31st of July.

That was the day My Marine flew in to the airport for his week of leave.

That is right ladies I got to see my man.

It was amazing to have him home.

We made so many memories this time home.

We took well over 400 pictures.

It blew my mind.

I owe everyone of my followes a HUGE catch up post.

Maybe one of pictures from my trip and with my man home.

Don't worry, I won't post all 400.

I hope to catch up with all the blogs I follow.

I have started, but I am no where near the end.

Sneak peek --

I wanted to make a quick post and leave with a sneak peek of our photo shoot today.

I hope every one is having a great week.

I can't wait to catch up with everyone's blog.

MIA

Sorry for being gone! My man is home. I am soaking up the time I have with seeing how he leaves back to base the 8th.

I have been gone for a long time and it is going to continue till after he leaves.

I left July 28 for vacation with my best friends family. We came back the 31st the day Eddie flew in. I have been with him ever since.

I will return I promise!! See every one the 8th.